Alas, I apparently don't think of blogging much these days. For crying out loud, I missed all of June! Of course, to be fair, I did have mono and decide definitively that I am pregnant that month. So I may have been thinking a little more about sleeping and having a baby than blogging...so guess what you are going to get to read about should you choose to continue.
I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant...
I would have never thought it was possible to think one same exact thought so much as I have in the past couple of months. But there it is. My sister did warn me that would happen. It seems like you would know it, maybe do something about it, and then not think about it much. Maybe I think about it a lot because things (mostly my body) keep changing. Like, if you are starting a new class you are excited about you might think of it a ton leading up to and as it starts, but then it becomes normal and you don't think about it much. However, I am beginning to feel like my body is changing everyday. It makes me a little nervous because I've been taking my time when it comes to maternity wear and preventing stretch marks, and I'm a little afraid that I will wake up one day, go to get dressed and realize that nothing fits me. Then I'll have to wear a towel as a skirt as I slink into the nearest maternity shop and try to find something more suitable.
It also fascinates me to experience the feelings and thoughts I am having. I'm pretty sure they are different than what I might experience with a second child. Just a little bit of the deer-in-the-headlights sensation mingled with I've-just-won-some-money-but-don't-know-where-it's-hidden.
But then, I've always been apprehensive of new adventures. So I plan and study and prepare as much as I can to help me feel more grounded before the actual event occurs. I studied the high school map before my first day so I'd be able to make my way through the halls without looking too much like a freshman. I had three possible class schedules outlined before I dialed 10 minutes early to be sure I could register in college for the things I wanted. I had my sister translate 25 useful phrases into Spanish so that I might survive my first day in Spain. And now I am reading parenting books and researching the best belly butters. At least I have learned one thing. Every adventure I try makes the next one not only easier but more enjoyable. So bring it on Motherhood, I am not afraid.
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me at my cousin's wedding
trigonometric is my favorite word, not because of what it means, but cause it's so much fun to say
about me
I was born in Vegas and somehow landed in Salt Lake City. I wonder how things work, like to laugh at anything worthy, and am craving sushi. Most days I wake up with a song in my head and sometimes I remember my dreams...funny things, dreams.
glitter shoes
me at my cousin's wedding
feel good thoughts
In the infinity of life where I am, all is perfect, whole, and complete. I release all fear, anxiety, and past hurts, knowing that the Universe takes care of me. I am enough. I trust, knowing that whatever I need to know is revealed to me, and that whatever I need comes to me. I support myself and life supports me. I am the power in my world. All is well in my world.
3 comments:
Ahh, I'm glad your back to blogging. That was fun to read. It's funny, but I think you think of being pregnant even more than you think, "I'm getting married" What is your opinion??
I don't know. Maybe it depends on how fast you get married. I imagine if people have a year or more to plan a wedding they may not think about it as consistently...at least I hope not. Man, when I was working on ours I was practically obsessed, but I only had 2 months to get it all together. I would have gone crazy thinking about it as much as I did for more than 2 months.
That is very reminiscent of our last conversation. And, in case I didn't mention it, YOU are amazing. And this one may just be the biggest adventure of all ones previous. Though, hopefully, the best also! (just don't talk to me too much, or you'll start to freak as. I still just can't fathom... :))
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